hope

Learn to focus your thoughts and energy on whatever helps you to prosper, be happy and charged to love. Just now unwinding...had a long, monotonous, drag-out of a day. But thats another thing I need to improve upon and thats to not be so easily bothered by what I can't control...I need not be so annoyed by things, period. Working on that...I attempted to work on fine-tuning that this time last year, but I was too focused on other irrelevant things. I loved going to church, but hated the fact that I only had a 2-3 shirt rotation and no kicks. The same worn, tattered jeans (that i have grown to be very attached to even though ive semi-retired them)... Trippy. Trivial pursuit of such items doesnt phase me anymore, but ive been conditioned to go without those items. I do like shoes and things of that nature, but it doesnt consume me to go out an get it or bog me down when I cant afford it. I was in the best shape of my life last summer, but I also wasnt goin out every weekend, or at all for that matter, and in order for me to function I obsessed over the gym. Envy, or avoiding it rather, will have you doing some shit you wouldnt normally do if you had it all. Yep, that was me last July...motivated by self-improvement, shackled by the clutches of Netflix, ashamed at the moth-consumed couture in my closet and tryna find my way. Butt hurt. lol. Its always been a gift (or a defense mechanism) to laugh at the randomness of life. It helped me cope with my reality. Still does. Additionally, I see the potential in myself and others, regardless of what negativity surrounds me or them, and that is why I continue to scratch & claw away out of my mind's coffin, when everything else around me is falling apart. Our lives, you & I, would make for good conversation down the road too...clinging on to what can be made of our lives and manifesting it so it'll become what is. Gotta start somewhere.